Wagers, Mustaches and Chirps

Posted on November 11, 2010

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I was talking on the phone with my father the other day when the conversation turned to wagers.  We’ve both been involved in smart plays and hairy situations alike and done so on a wide variety of topics.  As we went story for story about thrilling victories, monumental collapses and best of all, the dumb shit we bet on, I brought up a mustache bet I had in college.  The mustache bet was my personal favorite in school.  It takes a certain kind of individual to go through with a wager when that is on the line.  It brands the loser more severely then a scarlet A.

"I swear I didn't know she was 12."

It didn’t matter what year you were because it looks goofy on just about everybody in the 18-25 age range.  Whether it’s Adam Morrison’s miserable looking piece he stole off an episode of to catch a predator or the slightly more refined porn star look of say, a young Dennis Eckersly, it is just plain old tougher to get laid with one on.  Not to mention, going out with a buddy who is sporting facial hair not of his choosing and with absolutely zero confidence is entertainment enough.

"I did a film with THE Dirk Diggler once!"

So when I informed him that in this story I lost and had to rock a maintained and well groomed “lady ticker,” poppa dukes chimes in with a classic line, “why would you cultivate around your mouth, that which grows wildly around you ass?”  Good point pops.  And that my friends was the chirp of the day.

Oh and check out this clip (which brings me back to our favorite half Asian’s basement drinking nights) from the greatest motion picture ever made, bar none.  It has it all: a ridiculous wager between good buddies, a ballsy approach to a broad to open and close at once, Goose with a ‘stache and of course Bud heavy bottles throughout.  Iconic to say the least.

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