Other News and Entertainment: Guy kills mom with sword, Lohan sluts it up at the gym, michael douglas is still alive!

Posted on November 29, 2010

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This also happened

your sign is backwards douche bag

Protesting with a mask is now illegal in D.C.Here is the article – Click Here.  Apparently there are rules for protesting.  You have to tell the cops before you start, you can’t protest before 7 am or after 10 pm, and now you can’t wear masks.  Back in the day, people used to smoke pot and beat the shit out of cops at protests, now people send E-vites and email the police department with the time, location, and exact number of people that RSVP’d.  But this mask rule in particular really chaps my ass.  I always wanted to wear a devil mask and punt a cabbage patch kid into an anti-abortion rally just to get a rise. So that’s out the window.  Also, how classic is this guy’s jean jacket?

Michael Brea – I didn’t even believe this story the first time I read about it, but this guy, who most Cised readers will recognize from the tv show Ugly Betty, killed his mom with a

Pretty normal guy

god damn sword.  He said he wasn’t actually killing her, that he was killing “the devil inside her”.  Either way its disturbing.  Don’t get me wrong, when I watch Braveheart and Gladiator I want nothing more than to grab a sword and behead someone, just to see at the very least if it is as easy as it looks.  But even if I was willing to go to jail for the rest of my life to find out what beheading someone feels like, and there is no way to know this for sure, but I am guessing I probably wouldn’t pick my mother as a target.  This is all assuming I was able to get my hands on a f#*king sword.  “I felt like Neo from the Matrix” said Brea.  That’s not weird.  I guess at some point Neo may have used a sword, but I associate him more with being a genius on the computer.  I feel like Neo when I am simultaneously checking NFL lines, g chatting, and scanning Redtube for a good new amateur video.  That’s just me though.  Here is the full story on this freak. Click Here

Michael Douglas – Once you start seeing reports in the tabloids of a celebrity getting old or sick you just kind of write them off as being dead.  At least I do.  So when I saw these pictures of Michael Douglas with his fam at Disney World I was like “wow, the dude that got raped in Disclosure is still alive”.

I know Catherine Zeta-Jones is a bombshell for her age, but doesn’t this picture kind of look like grandpa with his grandkids and their nanny?  I am sure that after getting off the roller coaster and peeling pieces of Michael Douglas’ skin off her face C Z-J looked her normal hot self but this pic just isn’t flattering of anyone.

Lindsay Lohan made news/TMZ by working out on Thanksgiving day.  When your family hates you, there is really no better place to go to blow off steam during the holidays than the gym.  I am pretty sure “steam” was not the first or second thing she blew that day, but give that bag of bones credit for breaking a sweat.  Speaking of which, is she trying to be ironic with that skeleton shirt?  I am a huge fan self-deprecation, but only when others do it.

Lohan: Not used to holding 10 inch poles horizontally, but doing her best

Miley Cyrus‘ mom is apparently divorcing Billy Ray and banging Brett Michaels?  I guess this happened a while ago but this is the first I’ve heard of it.  Not surprised the former Mrs. Cyrus wants to upgrade now that she has a billionaire daughter, but I am not quite sure Brett is an upgrade.  She should be scooping up a 28 yr old football player, not some balding bandana wearing has-been who almost croaked a couple months ago.

way too young to be fatter and uglier than your mom

Must be nice to have a cash cow for a daughter though.  But not so nice to have a cow for a daughter.  Miley is putting on pounds as of late and these pictures are proof.  Apparently the Thanksgiving turkey she ate went straight to her neck as you can see in her ever growing wattle.  She can almost stash her Iphone in that loose skin.  At least some change or chapstick or whatever she might want to access throughout the day.  She’s like a human Pez dispenser.  Tilts her chin up in the air and all sorts of shit could fall out.  Kind of legit.

 

– W

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